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How to Use the Enneagram of Personality to Build Intimacy

January 4, 2011

What kind of attitudes, beliefs, and feelings are coming at you in intimacy?  Would you like to find out why you’ve been reacting so much in your intimate relationship?   Learn about yourself and others using a personality system that could change the way you respond to, and build intimacy with, your partner.

I first began learning about the Enneagram in the late 1980’s, and it changed the way I see myself and others for the better.    I now understand that I habitually used certain feelings and thoughts to color or mold my experience with my partner, and it was so freeing to open this awareness.   You can open your awareness too, have more options in your responses with your partner, and fight less often too.

The Enneagram of Personality improves intimacy by increasing your awareness of how you think and feel, which is very freeing, and by helping you see there can be old habits that lead to similar fights with your partner.  When you take the personality test here, listed as the Rheti full test http://www.enneagraminstitute.com/Tests_Battery.asp

you can print the results for your own benefit.  Feel free to contact me to ask questions about your results if you would like.

The Enneagram is a guide to understanding people—how we are different, how we are similar, what drives us, and how we relate to each other. It is an invaluable tool for intimacy problems, where cooperation, awareness, and working together are essential to success. The Enneagram system describes nine distinct personality types and their interrelationships. Each personality type associated with the Enneagram represents a map of traits that highlights patterns of thinking, feeling, and behaving. By learning one’s type, along with the patterns and habits associated with that type, one can use the Enneagram system as an effective tool for improved emotional intimacy.  Your own self understanding can increase a great deal too, which helps intimacy problems by giving you different things to say when relating.

Why not give the test a try?  All you have to lose are some old habits that you are probably tired of anyway, and with an accurate test you will know what they are!   Over time you can learn the personality of your partner too, which can help you be less reactive to THEIR habits.   It could be the beginning of a much deeper acceptance and understanding of yourself and your intimate relationship.

Jim Bowen MA LPC has been assisting individuals and couples since 1992, with offices in Boulder and Denver. Contact Jim with email or call him at 303-534-8717. Why not call for a free consultation?

Filed Under: Building Intimacy, Couples and Marriage Counseling, Healthy Marriage Tagged With: Building Intimacy, emotional intimacy, Enneagram, Healthy Marriage, intimacy problems, marriage intimacy, Relationship Help

Building Intimacy Topics

  • Affair – Infidelity
  • Building Intimacy
  • Communication
  • Couples and Marriage Counseling
  • Healthy Marriage
  • Integrative Body Psychotherapy
  • Premarital Counseling

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